# Middle Earth careers for the 21st Century



## Elbereth (Mar 7, 2002)

I am currently job hunting and it got me thinking...If the characters of Middle Earth had to job hunt in today's modern world, what career would they choose. 

For example: 

Sam would own his own landscaping company with a green house on the side.

Bilbo would be an author

Frodo would be a copy editor

Gimli would be a jewelry expert at an auction house or a antiques dealer.

and I could see Gandalf either as a news correspondant for CNN or a college professor.


Well those are my ideas...what do you think?


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## Mormegil (Mar 7, 2002)

Sauron would be the richest man in the world and the head of a global computing company called Necrosoft. 
Of course he would still be obsessed with world domination.

Elrond would be a financial advisor, or something equally as boring.

Tom Bombadil would be running a health farm.


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## LadyGaladriel (Mar 7, 2002)

Elrond and Tom and all the elves would be the hippy nation


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## cortezthekiller (Mar 7, 2002)

Saruman would sell Amway.


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## Legolam (Mar 7, 2002)

What's Amway?

And Pippin would run a novelty "look where I've been" bar


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## elenya (Mar 8, 2002)

Legolas would be a hairstylist. Well he does have really nice hair!....please don't hurt me.


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## Beleg Strongbow (Mar 8, 2002)

Merry would be a consultant or a head of a smoking empire.


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## Elbereth (Mar 8, 2002)

Merry is pretty slick...I could see him as an undercover reporter...or maybe even a secret agent. 

And Sauron would be a drug lord. 

I can see Pippen being a struggling actor type...


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## Legolam (Mar 8, 2002)

If Sauron was a drug lord, then Tom would either be one of his dealers, or a hippy guy that hung round outside Sauron's place!


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## cortezthekiller (Mar 8, 2002)

Literally, I think Amway sells soap-type products. But its infamy comes in that it is one of the most popular of those mult-level marketing pyramid schemes. If you ever run across someone trying to get you to join the scheme you may notice they seem to be a little brainwashed, and that they are attempting to do the same (brainwashing) to you.


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## YayGollum (Mar 8, 2002)

This is kind of like my thread about what cars they would all have. It's buried in S&B somewhere. Gollum would be President! Right?


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## Mormegil (Mar 8, 2002)

No, I think Gollum would be a garbage man. Searching continually through rubbish, trying to find his preciousss.


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## Gary Gamgee (Mar 8, 2002)

Saruman is a real estate agent.

One of the finest Third Age towers avaialbe on the market for the first time. Impenitrable black stone exterior with high welcoming windows, cut back gardens that have recently began to encroach, may need some work, inherits plenty of ground staff.

500 bedrooms, two en-suit. Smoking and billiards room. Lounge area and high steps with Stainar stair lift for elderldy relatives. All seeing Palantir entertainment system, with Dolby surround sound and DVD, fully installed. Roof Garden may be used as a lodging room, last tenant well impressed, so much so he left his staff behind, spitting distance from the garden staff.

Nice Neighbours.

GGG


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## aranel (Mar 10, 2002)

Replying to cortez, Amway is not like that. To find out what it is really about, go to its sister company, www.quixtar.com to see the products available, and how it actually works. Please do not post anything that you don't know anything about. Amway and Quixtar are both great business opportunities and they do not attempt to 'brainwash" anyone. Anyone willing to work and wants to use great products, not just soap, should really take a look at it. Now to the post:

Elrond would probably be a librarian, or historian. Perhaps anthropologist?
Aragorn would probably be in the military. Prehaps be a Seal?
Sam would be a landscape designer.
I agree, Gollum probably would be a trash collector!


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## Turgon (Mar 11, 2002)

I think Wormtongue would definitely be in politics - a spin doctor or something and Tom Bombadil could be on daytime TV - This Morning with Tom and Goldberry. That would be cool.


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## cortezthekiller (Mar 12, 2002)

Aranel,

I went to the site to become more learned on Amway, as you suggested. Truth is, you're right, all I know about it is from two best friends, who were involved in it. Both of them kind of reminded me of Saruman in the "Voice of Saruman" chapter, while they were involved. Neither are involved with Amway anymore, and they don't have anything bad to say about it...so I apologize for the "brainwash" comment. Though, I enjoy spending time with my friends again, so that's good. Anyway, back to the site...I wasn't able to find any useful information there? Do you have to register to actually get an explanation of the company and its products?

Radagast - Animal Trainer
Gandalf - Professor of History
Merry & Pippin - joint owners of a smoke shop
Sauron - Head of a Drug Cartel
Frodo - social worker
Bilbo - journalist
Sam - Gardener, military reserve
Legolas - gymnast...maybe trapeze artist
Gimli - mason
Boromir - politician


Aragorn left off because I don't know. He goes through such a transformation in the story that it's hard.


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## Aredhel (Mar 12, 2002)

Arwen-talk show host:The Arwen Undomiel Show.


That's all I can think of for now.


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## Camille (Mar 15, 2002)

> Sauron would be the richest man in the world and the head of a global computing company called Necrosoft.


that is hilarious!!!!!


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## tookish-girl (Mar 15, 2002)

Frodo wouldn't have a job, he'd be part of the landed gentry who do nothing all day, expect walking in the countryside and daydreaming.

Pippin would have a joke shop and Merry would probably run a mobile disco, don't know why, can just see him there on the the decks!

Gandalf might go pro with the fireworks thing!

Galadriel would be part of the W.I. making tea for people at jumble sales.

Arwen would work at the perfume counter at Boots. With Glorfindel and Celeborn.

Boromir would be a second-hand car salesman.

Saruman would run a beauty palour specialising in manicures.


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## Mormegil (Mar 15, 2002)

Thankyou Camille, at least someone found it funny.

Come on people.
Necrosoft.


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## Elbereth (Mar 15, 2002)

> Saruman would run a beauty palour specialising in manicures.



Sauruman as a manicurist...now that is funny...I can just picture him now with a pink smock on painting some poor girl's toes bright red. hahaha!!!!


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## tookish-girl (Mar 16, 2002)

> _Originally posted by Mormegil _
> *Thankyou Camille, at least someone found it funny.
> 
> Come on people.
> Necrosoft.  *



Yes, it's funny! I agree too!


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## Gary Gamgee (Mar 16, 2002)

i found it funny too. tookish i also think the idea of Galadreil being a member of the wi hilarious as well but i can't see her slow hand clapping Blair hee hee i think she would have disagreed with that.

3G's


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## King_Telcontar (Mar 16, 2002)

Aragorn ummmmmmmmmm what can I think of for Aragorn. ah Aragorn would start out in military (almost every branch possible) studying the History of the world on the side, and then eventually become President of the States or King of some foreign country.


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## Elbereth (Mar 17, 2002)

I can picture Aragorn being the Indiana Jones type...the Professor/Adventurer...who is out to collect rare artifacts and in the effort saves the world from a catastrophic destruction. (And landing the pretty girl every time)


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## tookish-girl (Mar 17, 2002)

Aragorn's a toughie. He would be quite a good as a nightclub owner I think. Or a bouncer!
Galadriel probably would slow-clap Blair, Gary! She'd probably be thinking "Ah, what does he know, I could run this country better myself!"


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## Meliaiel (Mar 17, 2002)

Sauron-glamrock star
Elbereth-an electrician

Legolas-archery teacher
Bilbo-surely a writer
Cirdan-admiral in the navy
Aragorn-a biker(still wandering...but on a steel horse )


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## My_Precious (Mar 17, 2002)

Hmm..
Pippin & Merry - MTV Vjs
Tom Bombadil - zoo director
Gandalf - math professor
Legolas - actor
Arwen - beauty salon owner
Aragorn - something to do with medicine, surgent, probably.


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## pippin le qer (Mar 17, 2002)

Saruman would'tbe a real estate agent, he would own a travel agency that
sends planeloads of people to cheap hotels with cheap food and waiters with the grace of Orcs. you know with those charters with at least a 10 hour delay you must have been there


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## LadyGaladriel (Mar 18, 2002)

Aragorn would be an agent like James Bond
tom and all the elves would be tree huggers
Galadriel would be a beautifull Marget thatcher
Gandalf would be a professer of history
Sauron would be a smooth head of a big industry like "Fur"


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## Elbereth (Mar 18, 2002)

Sting...I agree Pippen and Merry would make great MTV vj's

Galadriel would be an political advisor.


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## The Lost Wizard (May 6, 2002)

Sauron might try for world domination again, but the Americans would bomb him into oblivion. How long could he survive in an Afghan cave? Scary thought having Orcs getting control of weapons of mass destruction though.


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## Shadowfax (May 6, 2002)

merry and Pippin would start out as landed gentry, but would then become bums after they had squandered their familys fortunes.


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## Morgoth (Feb 21, 2004)

It's been ages since someone posted in this thread, but here's my offering
Gorbag and Shagrat- In a Swedish Death Metal band
Denethor- Used car salesman
Galadriel- Psychiatrist
Eomer (film version)- Replacement for Kurt Cobain


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## Tinuvien21 (Feb 21, 2004)

Gollum would work at a Marina,with lots of fish.
Sauron would sell eyeglasses
Elrond would be a librarian.


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