# How many members does it take....



## Beorn (Aug 7, 2003)

Found this on another site...don't get offended, it's not directed at anyone...just laugh:

How many forum posters does it take to change a light bulb? 

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed 

16 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently 

6 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs 

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs 

50 to flame the spell checkers 

48 to correct spelling/grammar flames 

7 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 

6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp" 

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct 

154 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy" 

118 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum 

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb forum about changing light bulbs be stopped 

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this forum 

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for 
this technique and what brands are faulty 

1 to ask if when buying a new bulb they should go for a screw or bayonet type 

98 to argue that their version of screw in or bayonet is better than the other and always will 

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs 

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's 

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group 

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too" 

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy 

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three" 

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ 

44 to ask what is a "FAQ" 

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?" 

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs" 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again 

You know who you are....



I can only imagine where this will go


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## FoolOfATook (Aug 7, 2003)

> 7 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another



I looked it up in _The Associated Press Stylebook_, and there was no listing for "lightbulb"/"light bulb", so following AP protocol, I checked _Webster's New World College Dictionary: Fourth Edition_, where there was no entry for "lightbulb", so we can safely use "light bulb". 






Tremendous stuff Beorn.


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## Mrs. Maggott (Aug 7, 2003)

Gee! I was just going to ask if you meant "purists" or FADS. For purists, the answer is _none_. We _never_ change. And for FADs, the answer is _also_ none since they would deny that the light bulb had been changed, but rather it had merely been _adapted!_


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## Galdor (Aug 7, 2003)

> 1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again



Absolutely hilarious Beorn.......I can just see all of those happening, but I think the last one was the best.


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## Nenya Evenstar (Aug 8, 2003)

It has happened.


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## Chymaera (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Beorn _
> *How many forum posters does it take to change a light bulb? *



So is the anwser 1 person + 1473 posts?


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## Lantarion (Aug 8, 2003)

> 118 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum


LMAO!!!


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## Aulë (Aug 8, 2003)

*Is tempted to start a thread about Light Bulbs to test this theory out*


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## Beorn (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Aulë _
> **Is tempted to start a thread about Light Bulbs to test this theory out*  *



It's a lamp!


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## Maeglin (Aug 8, 2003)

Were you in the industry?! How would you know?!!


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## Beorn (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Glorfindel1187 _
> *Were you in the industry?! How would you know?!! *



More or less...in theater, we only use bulbs for parts of the set (i.e. someone turns on a light). Everything else are halogen lamps 

BTW, a bulb is lamp shaped like this:

```
_.-._
     /_.~  \
     |_.~-*|
     |_.~-*|
     |_.~-*|
    /       \
   /         \
  |           |
  |           |
  |           |
  \           /
   `.       .'
     `-._.-'
```

Typically, when we change lamps, we use leather gloves sinces the lights are so hot. In addition to the leather gloves, we can only hold the lamp with a piece of foam. Never, ever touch a halogen lamp, or you'll have a broken halogen lamp a few minutes after you turn it on...(hot shards of glass flying everywhere is very dangerous)


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## Maeglin (Aug 8, 2003)

Okay, you win!! And apparently it only takes one member to do everything mentioned above.....Beorn!! He answered everything.


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## Nenya Evenstar (Aug 8, 2003)

Not necessarily . . . I'm curious as to why the lamp breaks if touched after being turned on.


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## MacAddict (Aug 8, 2003)

Hmmm, I wonder where I fit in...


~MacAddict


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## Beorn (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Nenya Evenstar _
> *Not necessarily . . . I'm curious as to why the lamp breaks if touched after being turned on. *



The oils on your skin get on the glass. Halogens typically burn at around a few hundred degrees. The oils boil, which cause fractures in the glass...and the fractures are a weakness...so it implodes on itself.


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## Nenya Evenstar (Aug 8, 2003)

Ahhh!!!! Very very interesting! Thanks Beorn.


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## Beorn (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Glorfindel1187 _
> *Okay, you win!! And apparently it only takes one member to do everything mentioned above.....Beorn!! He answered everything.  *



Actually, I'm waiting for someone to correct my grammar in my first post about lamps vs. bulbs


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## FREEDOM! (Aug 8, 2003)

I think I would fit in as the forum lurker to start up the conversation 6 months later. I've done it b4.


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## BranMuffin (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Beorn _
> *More or less...in theater, we only use bulbs for parts of the set (i.e. someone turns on a light). Everything else is halogen lamps
> Typically, when we change lamps, we use leather gloves since the lights are so hot. In addition to the leather gloves, we can only hold the lamp with a piece of foam. Never, ever touch a halogen lamp, or you'll have a broken halogen lamp a few minutes after you turn it on...(hot shards of glass flying everywhere is very dangerous) *



Fixed some...



> The oils on your skin get on the glass. Halogens typically burn at around a few hundred degrees. The oils boil, which cause fractures in the glass...and the fractures are a weakness...so it implodes on itself.



Car headlights, too. For anyone who tries to change the blown headlight on your car....


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## Galdor (Aug 8, 2003)

Look everyone, this is the *Tolkienforum*, a place to talk about Tolkien's works. And as far as I know light bulbs have nothing to do with Tolkien's Middle Earth. So if you people want to discuss light bulbs than take it somewhere else. I'm sure there are plenty of light bulb forums out there for this type of discussion. All you guys are doing is eating up WM's bandwidth with topics that have nothing to do with Tolkien. Have some consideration people.


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## Elendil3119 (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by BranMuffin _
> *Fixed some...*


Bran, you have *no* right to correct other people's posts!!! It's very rude to tout your "superior" spelling skills over other people. Didn't your mama teach you anything?!  Next time just keep your corrections to yourself! 



P.S. Galdor, it's lightbulb...


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## Maeglin (Aug 8, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Galdor _
> * So if you people want to discuss light bulbs than take it somewhere else. *



Galdor made a grammar error there! It should be *then*, not than!! Now either learn how to speak and spell perfect English or get off the forums!! WM has no room for such mistakes!!


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## Nenya Evenstar (Aug 8, 2003)

Now, now, everyone, calm down!!! Step back, take a deep breath, and move on! There's no need to get so angry about all this!

Needless to say, I agree with Galdor. This is no place to be discussing light bulbs. Tolkien discussion is what this place is for!


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## FoolOfATook (Aug 9, 2003)

> P.S. Galdor, it's lightbulb...



No, I've already demonstrated that it's light bulb.


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## Aulë (Aug 9, 2003)

> _Originally posted by Galdor _
> *Look everyone, this is the Tolkienforum, a place to talk about Tolkien's works. And as far as I know light bulbs have nothing to do with Tolkien's Middle Earth. So if you people want to discuss light bulbs than take it somewhere else. I'm sure there are plenty of light bulb forums out there for this type of discussion. All you guys are doing is eating up WM's bandwidth with topics that have nothing to do with Tolkien. Have some consideration people. *



Now, now, now.
Calm down.
_All_ members in this forum use light bulbs, therefore all light bulb discussion is relevant.
Also, I am sure that JRR Tolkien used light bulbs too.


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## Theoden_king (Aug 9, 2003)

I am considering buying a new bulb for a light in my bedroom, now the dilemma I face is should I buy a screw bulb or a bayonet bulb? I will let the professionals handle this question.


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## Beorn (Aug 10, 2003)

I suggest a screw-base lamp. Most residential lighting fixtures require a screw-base lamp....


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## ltas (Aug 10, 2003)

I have been using bayonet bulbs for years and I can assure you that all or even most residential lamps *do not* require a screw-in bulb.

Besides, changing a bayonet bulb is so much easier to do than changing a screw-in bulb. You can find out more about the subject by clicking this link: http://www.eskom.co.za/customers/electricitytips/changealightbulb_content.hmtl


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## Beorn (Aug 11, 2003)

> _Originally posted by ltas _
> *I have been using bayonet bulbs for years and I can assure you that all or even most residential lamps do not require a screw-in bulb.
> 
> Besides, changing a bayonet bulb is so much easier to do than changing a screw-in bulb. You can find out more about the subject by clicking this link: http://www.eskom.co.za/customers/electricitytips/changealightbulb_content.hmtl *



You fool....you posted the wrong URL...go HERE:
http://www.eskom.co.za/customers/electricitytips/changealightbulb_content.html


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## BranMuffin (Aug 11, 2003)

Be REAL carefu lwhen installing the new lightbulb. They can be quite trecherous. I've been electocuted before while changing one(I couldn't feel my hand for a couple hours).


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## Beorn (Feb 7, 2004)

Beorn said:


> 1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again



I guess that's me!


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## Aulë (Feb 7, 2004)

Beorn said:


> I guess that's me!



*thwacks Mike* 

If you want to discuss light bulbs, go to the Light Bulb Forum!


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## Sarde (Feb 7, 2004)

After reading this thread about light bulbs (or lightbulbs or lamps, but the Official Lightbulb Forum writes 'light bulb', so I take it that is correct ), I have come to look differently at light bulbs. I never knew how interesting they were and that one could have such delightful conversation about them. 

A light bulb forum!!!! Can you believe it?!?!?!

I wonder if any really controversial discussions go on there, I'm gonna be reading through that forum.


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## Rangerdave (Feb 7, 2004)

www.bulbs.com/
www.howstuffworks.com/light-bulb.htm
www.bulbcollector.com/
www.topbulb.com/
http://www.ahajokes.com/light_bulb_jokes.html




Me Too's

RD


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## Rhiannon (Feb 13, 2004)

I should go to bed...

That is _hysterical_. 

My lightbulbs burn out, and I adapt to living in darkness until someone tells to just change the freaking bulb already before I go blind reading in the dark.


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## spirit (May 13, 2005)

> 1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again


  Who ME?

Although it's been more than 6 months!


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## Barliman Butterbur (May 13, 2005)

I have found this entire thread to be most _*illuminating!*_    

Barley


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## e.Blackstar (May 13, 2005)

Wow, Barley, what a punster you are.  

And for all of you out there who think that this forum is ONLY for Tolkien discussion, let me remind you that this is the Stuff and Bother section, and to please keep your moderating little honkers out of our very serious and quite legitimate lightbulb (alternately-light bulb) discussion.


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## spirit (May 16, 2005)

e.Blackstar said:


> And for all of you out there who think that this forum is ONLY for Tolkien discussion, let me remind you that this is the Stuff and Bother section, and to please keep your moderating little honkers out of our very serious and quite legitimate lightbulb (alternately-light bulb) discussion.



Is someone out there on a role or something!?


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## Durin's Bane (May 16, 2005)

Btw. how many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb (a ligh bulb if you like it thet way)?

None, they'll all say it's a hardware problem...


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## AraCelebEarwen (Jun 8, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

I think I lost track, how many was that?  

That's sooooo good!!!!!!!!!


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## e.Blackstar (Jun 9, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

If I am not mistaken, I do believe that Beorn put this same thing in Stuff and Bother...just so you know.


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## Durin's Bane (Jun 9, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

Mhm, and that makes 3 forums that this has been posted twice (and that's only the forums I visit!) So I guess it's not just us.


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## HLGStrider (Jun 9, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

All you internet junkies are alike!

It doesn't surprise me that Beorn got to it first. . .but I didn't see it the first time, so it's new to me.


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## Alatar (Jun 9, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

Thats good,I thought i had heard it somewhere else so probebly from beorn.
Ah, the internet.


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## Durin's Bane (Jun 9, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

I've posted this on the other thread so let's give it here as well:



How many programmers does it take to change a light-bulb?

None, they'll all say it's a hardware problem.


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## Hammersmith (Jun 9, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*



Durin's Bane said:


> Mhm, and that makes 3 forums that this has been posted twice (and that's only the forums I visit!) So I guess it's not just us.


Three other forums for me, too! Though I've been cold turkey on all of them for a while now.


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## HLGStrider (Jun 10, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

This is it for me! Just this one forum. . .which, considering how long I am on every night, is probably obsessive.


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## AraCelebEarwen (Jun 14, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*



HLGStrider said:


> This is it for me! Just this one forum. . .which, considering how long I am on every night, is probably obsessive.



But such a good choice!!!


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## celebnaurwen (Jun 16, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*




> 12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.


And then about 10 of those 12 to return a few weeks later, 'cause they just can't stay away.


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## Greenwood (Jun 16, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

You missed a few specific to TTF:

6 to ask if the old bulb is really out or has it become a wraith

4 to debate whether it was Sauron or Saruman who caused the old bulb to fail

10 to ask what would Gandalf have done if the light bulb on staff had staff failed in Moria

15 to debate whether the shadows cast when the new bulb is on are wings

22 to argue that the blown bulb was Peter Jackson's fault

22 to argue that the replacement bulb from Jackson was at least as bright as the old bulb


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## celebnaurwen (Jun 16, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

A few trolls to jump in to say "light bulbs suck" and insult everyone's parentage...


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## Wraithguard (Jun 21, 2005)

*Re: This is so. . .us . . .*

1 new guy to say "I thought this was a LotR forum!"

13 to comment on his post and say evil things

9 to yell at the 13 about the evil things

1 new guy leaving the forum because of all the yelling


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